This month has been pure hell in my body! I had all these content plans for October that have just gone to hell in a hand basket because I've been so unwell.
Twenty-some-odd years ago, while pregnant with my first, I had my first gallbladder attack. And over the last twenty-some-odd years, I've dealt with sporadic gallbladder attacks. But usually, it's a fleeting problem. I'll have 3 bad days and then no real issues for a year and that's how its been for all these years.
About a year or so ago, I finally got the offer to get my gallbladder removed. Then, I had a night in the emergency room after a 3-day attack and ended up having a wicked panic attack at the taste of the saline through an IV. I didn't even get to the point of getting pain medication because my reaction to the panic was an extreme case of flight mode activated! I spent multiple days after that just absolutely knocked on my ass from the extremeness of the panic that set in.
So, I ended up calling and canceling the surgery option because fear has taken over in the worst way. I just don't know how to navigate that panic. The medical trauma I experience these days is so overwhelming.
And apparently the universe has decided to reward that decision by kicking my ass with epic gallbladder issues since. It's just been days and days of constant pain under my ribs and feeling utterly crap! In response, I've been curled up in a ball and sleeping lots and getting absolutely nothing done. There have been entire days where I haven't even looked at my phone, which almost never happens!
I think I'm starting to feel better, for the moment. I'm taking things easy and eating very slowly and mindfully because I know certain foods trigger my gallbladder. I've been moving more and sleeping less, so hopefully I'm at the end of this particular battle. And hopefully it'll be a bit before I have another gallbladder attack that has me laid up for days...
Especially being that I have so much online work to do. I've just massively neglected everything and my to-do list is getting insanely long. The number of videos I have that need to be edited and posted is officially overwhelming! So fingers crossed and all...